Notes on Gratitude

so grateful to be alive and able that I am missing what's in plain sight. not sure if it's pessimism I lack or time to process it all. keep housekeeping until it's a house worthy of inhabitants, but damn straight it's not always easy or pretty, as incapable as I am of admitting. fuck. gratitude, optimism, and service are so valuable in the everyday pursuit, but there's a realism neglected that illuminates the fragility of self without soulmates. we need each other, and as capable and incredible as I am, I need backup too. I hope i'm doing what I can to facilitate its arrival (and departure).